Tips for Parents to Help Youth

Conversation Skills

Developing good conversation skills is at once one of the most helpful and the most difficult skills you can help your children acquire. Once mastered, this ability will serve them well throughout their lives: in school, work, and social occasions.

Here are the steps to follow in becoming an effective conversationalist. By helping your children practice, you can brush up on your skills as well.

Contributing to discussions

1. Look at the people who are talking.
2. Wait for a point when no one else is talking.
3. Make a short, appropriate comment that relates to the topic being discussed.
4. Choose words that will not be offensive or confusing to others.
5. Give other people a chance to participate.

Maintaining the conversation

1. Keep a relaxed but attentive posture. Nod your head to give ongoing encouragement.
2. Ask follow-up questions that pertain to what the other person has just said.
3. Avoid fidgeting, looking away, or yawning.
4. Don’t interrupt the other person. If interruptions occur, say, "Excuse me," and let the other person finish.
5. Take your turn in the conversation, but be careful not to dominate or exaggerate.

Closing the conversation

1. Change topics only when everyone appears to be finished talking about a particular issue.
2. Change to a conversation topic that somehow relates to the previous one, if possible.
3. Allow everyone a chance to talk about the current topic.
4. If it is time to leave the table or room, wait for a comfortable break in the conversation. Stand and say, "Excuse me. . ." or, "It was very nice talking to you. . . ."

You can have a lot of fun as a family practicing conversation skills during dinner and family meetings. Choose topics that everyone can contribute to, from youngest to oldest, such as where to spend your next day off together. Include such applicable restrictions as budget and location. Following the steps of contributing to discussions, take turns voicing opinions. You will have a lively conversation and, possibly, a plan for your next day off.

Another idea is to take turns being the celebrity of the week. Family members can prepare questions to ask the celebrity and can form the answers into a "newspaper article." You will find out new and interesting information about each other!

Other possible topics include the following:

• Books that you all have read
• A current event of local, national, or international importance
• Your favorite kind of music
• A television program suitable for all family members

Let the ages and interests of family members guide your choice.